Just when you thought you weren’t teaching your kids.\u2026.<\/p>\n
My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE – “If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside – I just finished cleaning!”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me RELIGION – “You better pray that will come out of the carpet!”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL: “If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me LOGIC: “Because I said so, that’s why.”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me FORESIGHT – “Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me IRONY – “Keep laughing and I’ll *give* you something to cry about.”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS – “Shut your mouth and eat your supper!”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM -“Will you *look* at the dirt on the back of your neck!”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me about STAMINA – “You’ll sit there ’til all that spinach is finished.”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me about WEATHER – “It looks as if a tornado swept through your room.”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS – “If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you; would you listen then?”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY – “If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times – Don’t exaggerate!!!”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE -“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION – “Stop acting like your father!”<\/p>\n
My mother taught me about ENVY – “There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do!”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Just when you thought you weren’t teaching your kids.\u2026. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE – “If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside – I just finished cleaning!” My mother taught me RELIGION – “You better pray that will come out of the carpet!” My mother taught me […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[538,370,5278,296,2123,174,848,847,798],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.churchedge.com\/illustrations\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7377"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.churchedge.com\/illustrations\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.churchedge.com\/illustrations\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.churchedge.com\/illustrations\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.churchedge.com\/illustrations\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7377"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.churchedge.com\/illustrations\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7377\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.churchedge.com\/illustrations\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7377"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.churchedge.com\/illustrations\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7377"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.churchedge.com\/illustrations\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7377"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}